Acid9.net

Hi, and thanks for visiting Acid9!

Far be it for me to accuse my audience of harbouring ulterior motives, but if you have found this site, chances are you have googled my name and are looking to get some dirt or some other form of incriminating info on me or my activities. If so, please direct your attention below where you will find that I have taken the liberty of crafting a personalised message.

Potential customers:

Hi, and thank you for your interest in whatever service I am currently involved in providing/distributing! In order to find out more about said product or service, please kindly direct your attention to the relevant company website, where I can assure you you will find more information, and MUCH less sarcastic, pointless blogging.

I sincerely hope that your perception of my professionalism has not been compromised by your experiences here today.

Prospective employers:

Hi, and thank you for considering me as a candidate for whatever role I am currently applying for/you are considering me for! I realise that by writing this I am not exactly helping my chances, unless the role I am being considered for has to do with blogging or web content development (hmm…), but I guess that I am hoping that your sense of humour transcends your disapproval of the contents of this blog.

Rest assured I am more than happy to completely nuke this site, forever purging the tubes of the internet of my poor attempts at humour should you choose to go ahead with my application.

Current employers:

Hi! Welcome to my blog. I hope that this site is not giving you any negative insight to my character that you can use against me on Monday, and please be assured that I am not working on this during work hours.

Family members:

Hi! Congratulations on finding my blog! Now that you can use the internet properly, I expect that I will get less phone calls from you asking me for tech support.

Friends/prospective partners/significant others:

Sorry guys, you won’t find any ammunition here. Try a social networking site or something.